"It always fascinated me how people go from loving you madly to nothing at all, nothing. It hurts so much. When I feel someone is going to leave me, I have a tendency to break up first before I get to hear the whole thing. Here it is. One more, one less. Another wasted love story. I really love this one. When I think that its over, that I'll never see him again like this... well yes, I'll bump into him, we'll meet our new boyfriend and girlfriend, act as if we had never been together, then we'll slowly think of each other less and less until we forget each other completely. Almost. Always the same for me. Break up, break down. Drunk up, fool around. Meet one guy, then another, fuck around. Forget the one and only. Then after a few months of total emptiness start again to look for true love, desperately look everywhere and after two years of loneliness meet a new love and swear it is the one, until that one is gone as well. There's a moment in life where you can't recover any more from another break-up. And even if this person bugs you sixty percent of the time, well you still can't live without him. And even if he wakes you up every day by sneezing right in your face, well you love his sneezes more than anyone else's kisses."
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Human contact
Two little girls on the bus with their dad. The elder (around 5ish) is having a tantrum, I have noise cancelling headphones on, wouldn't have noticed if I hadn't looked over..
The dad is inspirationally calm.
I study her, in small glances; bits of bright red in her cheeks, pouty mouth, slightly runny nose, disheveled curly mop, pink top with red dungarees and spotted sox. She is absolutely adorable.
Little sis is ignoring the whole thing, swinging her legs and looking about.
As they get off at their stop, both little girls use my arm to guide themselves down the stairs (sitting at the back, bottom, back to the driver, in the aisle)
I get the most brilliant smile and arm squeeze from both kids.
They made my heart glow a little.
Hay-fever?
I can't believe it only just dawned on me what I've been missing by closing my heart to animals.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Friday, July 16, 2010
We are What We Choose
How will you use your gifts? What choices will you make?
Will inertia be your guide, or will you follow your passions?
Will you follow dogma, or will you be original?
Will you choose a life of ease, or a life of service and adventure?
Will you wilt under criticism, or will you follow your convictions?
Will you bluff it out when you're wrong, or will you apologize?
Will you guard your heart against rejection, or will you act when you fall in love?
Will you play it safe, or will you be a little bit swashbuckling?
When it's tough, will you give up, or will you be relentless?
Will you be a cynic, or will you be a builder?
Will you be clever at the expense of others, or will you be kind?"
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
a collection of collections
"I love and treasure individuals as I meet them. I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to."
Friday, March 12, 2010
Segmented Love
Standing in my office's teeny kitchen..
peeling an orange..
Just had the most vivid flashback of my grandmother and I..
and how she always peeled and segmented (or cut into bite size bits) my fruit for me..
we would sit together, me watching cartoons/drawing/playing, her talking at me (but not really expecting me to listen, as I only learnt years later.. after having the guilt of all the years I thought I was being rude by ignoring her, 'cause she'd talk and then walk away out of earshot.. only to realise that she, just like me [probably because of her!] talks to herself out loud) about some random family member, household chore or idea or something..
she would methodically peel and share her segmented fruit with me..
one for her.. a couple for me..
she's sweet like that.
I hope I can be just as good a grandmother as she is..
I love you gram.
x
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